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Guys, from, About, etc., date, dating, opinion

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Question by Aprile:

Opinion from guys about dating, sex on 2nd date, etc.?

About amonth ago I met this great guy, well he seems that way and the more I've talked to him, the more I'm attracted to him. Our first date was simple and casual. Met at a coffee shop and talked for about an hour and a half. He later expressed he needed to take care of some things, but that he was happy to meet me. The next day he texted me and sent me a link to his business online and asked me to tell him what I thought. I browsed the website and told him my opinion. After that text, I never knew anything about him. I texted him about 2 weeks later after our first date and I was concerned he didn't reply yo my text through the entire day. Later in the afternoon, he texted me and said he was sorry, that he was busy at work, he works long hours and can't keep up with texts, etc. That he's more comfortable talking on the phone than using texts and he prefers to return calls to his family or clients than friends. I was ooookk.. I respect that and maybe I was too much. So he also expressed that we only met for the purpose of being friends, and I agree as well. Anyways...to make story short. I was bored the other evening and he came across my mind. I just got out of work and since I don't go out, I decided to call my "new friend" who I haven't talked to in a while and wanted to know about him and if he wanted to date, hang out, have a couple of drinks and talk. He agreed, but first he mentioned he was invited to have dinner w/ some of his friends and that he didn't know if he was going or not. Ok, that gave me doubts of that he wanted to see me. But I continued to get him into trying to get together and he'd prefer to hang out w/ his friends, I'd completely understand and we could meet some other time. He decided not to meet w/ his friends for dinner and agreed on getting together. I told him I wanted to get couple of drinks with him and talk about life. Have a good time at a local lounge, bar, etc. He said he didn't have enough money to go out, so I offered to get some wine and I could meet him at his place. At first I said to myself, what am I doing? but at the same time, (being interested in the guy) I thought offering to visit him instead of making him come out and spend the money he doesn't have would be a good idea. So I bought the wine and we met about an hour later at his place. He's very corteous, a true gentleman, great host. We watched a movie, drank some wine and talked about everything, life, work, family, dating etc. After a couple of hours and while watching the movie we both got a bit flirty and things started to get hot. He asked if I was attracted to him and I told him that yes, that from the moment I saw him and after our first date. He said "why didn't you tell me then" and I told him that because I was shy and I didn't know if he would respond in the same way I was feeling. So then he started talking about the different approaches used towards someone you like and he suggested a kiss. So we kissed and the next thing we knew, is we were on at each other. So we got intimate and had a great time. He didn't rush, neither did I. It was time for me to leave, he helped me get into my vehicle and I let him know I got home safe and he replied. This was this past Friday, it's Sunday and haven't heard from him. I've been thinking about giving him a few days, maybe weeks or months and get back in touch with him and try to get on a 3rd date. I know he's a very busy person due to his job, but he does take time out to date other women and be with his friends. Maybe I did wrong by sleeping with him so soon, but at the end I dont think it makes any sense for holding on for months and then at the end discover the guy you waited for is a total jerk. On my last relationship, I waited for months before I had sex with my ex, and at the end he was just a huge mistake in my life.

Question for the guys, what do you think of a woman who sleeps with you on a 2nd date?

Would you usually date her again?

What can you tell from this guy I described above? is he into me or is he just a player?

I understand men don't show emotions much or none at all, but what do you guys suggest I do to get this guys attention more often and get him to not jump into a relationship with me, but to see me more often and get to know me better and I can get to know him better as well. Be his friend first and support him in anything I can.

Suggestions please.. Ladies if you're here, I need your comments if you'd want to contribute.
Sorry it's so long, but I want you to know what's going on. Need answers. Thanks

Best answer:

Answer by Sarah
Here's the problem:
"He said he didn't have enough money to go out, so I offered to get some wine and I could meet him at his place. At first I said to myself, what am I doing? but at the same time, (being interested in the guy) I thought offering to visit him instead of making him come out and spend the money he doesn't have would be a good idea. So I bought the wine and we met about an hour later at his place." You're making yourself WAY too available. He blew you off and you drove out to see him and even brought wine!
This guy may or may not be a player but he's definitely not that into you. If he was he would make time for you. He obviously somehow finds a way to see his friends and family (people who are actually important to him).
The best thing you can do (in any relationship) is not appear desperate. Don't answer his calls or call him back immediately. Let him sweat it out... or move on. Either way, DON'T call him. Especially after you slept with him.
I'm happily married to a man I slept with on the second date, but after sleeping together, you better believe I didn't come on clingy or desperate. I let him pursue me- never the other way around.

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

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Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Opinion from guys about dating, sex on 2nd date, etc.?

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